Out of the Blue

I had the first part of a root canal last night. Dr. Toothy assured me that I would start feeling better quickly, but by the time I reached the train station I already needed another painkiller, about an hour after my previous one. The ride home was agonizing, with intense pain from my tooth and severe nausea from painkillers and antibiotics on an empty stomach. This got steadily worse until I threw up (lucky I brought my own train sickness bag, since I was nauseated all day), at which point everything started getting better, so Dr. Toothy was right after all. I feel much better already this morning, and after catching up on stuff I missed yesterday, presumably will be back on track.

Mending Links! Thanks Mike Martinez and Ant.
Link: The Anatomy of a Fanboy. Thanks Richard.
Stories: Comma quirk irks Rogers. Thanks Brian.
Penguins corralled on Texas highway. Thanks nin.
Giant Robot Imprisons Parked Cars. "You eat Cadillacs, Lincolns too, Mercurys and Subarus."
Science: Mars's Peroxide Snow Would Kill Any Surface Life. Or make it blonde.
Nanowires built to fight bioterrorism.
Link between Parkinson's and rhinitis revealed.
Media: High Speed Police Chase After Bicycle Rider on Freeway.
Darth Vader goes on Blind Date. Thanks frag.machine.
ABC Nails Exxon and Republicans for Fake Al Gore Video.
Follow-up: Bacteria may have eaten through Alaskan oil pipe.
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78.
 
Re: Second Opinion
Aug 9, 2006, 22:53
78.
Re: Second Opinion Aug 9, 2006, 22:53
Aug 9, 2006, 22:53
 
Oh boy, Enahs... well, I'll go section-by-section... Apologies for the resultingly long post.

So you want to but you just have not had relationship. Not really all that uncommon.

You are correct. Not uncommon, though? I'm not sure... but there I go again!

Ok, I will help you out. Seriously, do everything I say. Trust me.

I trust you wholeheartedly and unconditionally, however dangerous that may be.

Check out the damn bullet points.

Looking...

# Brush your teeth
# Put on clean clothes
# Put on deodorant
# Go out into the real world where you will find girls. If you want more then just sexual intercourse then do not go to just any place, go to a places that you enjoy and if another woman (or man…whatever gets your rocks off) is there you might have a common ground.

I brush and floss, and, on occasion, even use mouthwash.
Yes, I put on clean clothes and use deoderant.
Going out into the real world I do every now and then (workplace doesn't count). In fact, I'm going to (gasp) karaoke tomorrow night at the Bennigan's restaurant by my workplace.

Here comes the hard part so I will chill on the bullet points and break it down.
There are two main styles to pickup women here for the novice; you should experiment with both.

I'll digress for a moment. I hate to think of it as "picking up". I just find "picking up" or "going out" (more the former than the latter) seemingly reducing the entire experience to superficiality - and thus, smalltalk, if I ever get to the point of opening my mouth and belting out a few words. Somehow I'm looking for what I would consider "intelligent" or "deep" conversation - not the type where one is devoid of meaning when she is saying plenty verbally.

Ditzy types (no offense to anyone) are not my type. It would seem almost too easy that the experience would not be fulfilling, and probably would not last very long.

I'm more than likely one of those types who is unrealistically looking for "the one".

Moving along...

Method one, the compliment to start a conversation. Give her a compliment; make it over something she controls like her hair or pants or shoes. It is not limited to clothing and hairstyle and accessories…the situation really dictates (do not go overboard and sound like some super flamboyant gay guy….unless you are). If she smiles and says thank you introduce your self and start a conversation. Do not worry about embarrassing your self, just totally get over it man. Just do it!

I find it extremely difficult to compliment. I have this irrational fear that I would say something wrong. Funny, I almost wrote something worse about myself.

Otherwise, I would have no idea how to continue after shooting the opening salvo. Wait; that's too violent of an image for this purpose. Let's try... opening the floodgates? No. I've no clue. Anywho...

Method two, Politely but firmly introduce your self (first name only) and flat out ask her out. Such as:
“Hi my name is Dan, would you like to go get a cup of coffee some time?”
Or
“Hi I’m Dan, me and my friends are going to a karaoke bar this (insert date) would you care to join me?”
Or
“Hi I’m Dan, would you like to go out sometime?”

That is it. If you do not like coffee (which I do not, change it to something else). You can mix it up, but do not get to specific. One line, short and sweet.

Saying "hi" and introducing myself is okay - nevermind; I usually don't get to introducing myself by name, at least not immediately. By the time that would happen, anyway, I would become the hopeless case yet again. Sometimes. Otherwise, I at least have a friend in the works. Of course, then I find out she's from England and returns there a week later.

Ok, now here comes the real secret. Ask as many women as possible. Trust me.
If you try either method with 10 women and just one responds positively, great. In one day you can ask 100 women and get 10 dates. Seriously it is just that easy. Also it will help you get over your shyness and whatever else and build your confidence; sure at first you will feel like you are embarrassing your self…but really so what? Get over it.

See above again about "the one" irrationality that I have. Further, I just have trouble treating it like a numbers game from that point. Either commit (to one), or do not commit, pretty much. Or rather, talk to not 100 women but perhaps two or three in one day. I seem somehow to have better luck relating to those who're much older than I am. That's always been the case since elementary school. Even my sister noted that I didn't talk like a "normal" person for my grade at the time - 4th, in this case, I think. Perhaps that's got something to do with it.

That is it, that is all you need to know about at least starting a relationship.
Try it, one day just go out and keep count, ask 100 girls out. You will quickly lose your nervousness and fear of rejection. Now getting a relationship started and having a relationship are two entirely different things. That comes later.

Seems I run into more women who already have relationships (either with boyfriends or husbands) than not. And those who don't seem slightly physically and psychologically unsound.

And remember, you only have to get the first inch in and then you are good for anything.

Er.. not sure how to respond to that.

Anywho, thanks for the tips. I'll be sure to deprecate myself even more highly keep them in mind.

Dan =0)

Self-plug: http://www.dankupka.com, http://www.myspace.com/dankupkamusic
XFire: Dan =0)
GW: Akpuk Lienad Lvl20 Mo/Me, Dilkaen Pauk Lvl10 Ne/El, Keilda Nakup Lvl 1 Ra, Leana Kipduk Lvl 13 El/Ra, Kaliena Dupk Lvl 4 Rt
Shameless self-plug(s): http://drdk.bandcamp.com - also on Spotify, Apple Music, YouTube, Amazon, etc.
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