Don't fuck with me, choadboy. I've made people on this message board cry more fucking times than you've masturbated to pictures of Gabe Newell. I can make you so fucking angry through sheer force of will alone that you can't sleep because you just lie there in bed, hand on your cock, trying to think about Gabe BUT DAMMIT YOU JUST FUCKING CAN'T because some guy named random.thought on the BluesNews message boards opened you up a second asshole.
Except it's not an asshole.
It's a vagina.