To say that America's Army is any more disturbing than anything else out there is just being plain ignorant of the world you live in and the games you play.
There's a difference between killing Zerg or Combine, and an actual military shooter, especially one endorsed by the Army. The difference is that one presents a fictional environment, while the other is an existing organization, which in that case amounts to propaganda. No one actually goes out and kills cops, or floods a city of joins Clan Starwolf as a result of playing games. The same can not be said for America's Army.
Given that the Army uses its games to attract recruits, being too realistic will ironically have the opposite effect. If the Army gets too realistic with its games, it will have a harder time convincing young people to "play army" for real.
In other words, lying. Using misinformation to attract individuals to a certain organization or set of ideals; isn't this the very definition of propaganda?
As far as gore, what do you expect? They want to keep a T rating for one, and two, WHY SHOULD THEY SHOW STUFF THAT WOULD HURT THEIR CAUSE? If you're trying to sell something, are you going to show all the bad parts?
Whatever happened to holding advertising, which AA certainly is, to some standards of truthfulness? Hell, Advil commercials are required by law to list all the side-effects, why not hold that same standard for the military, and in fact all advertising?
Dictionary.com gives the definiton of militarism:
1. Glorification of the ideals of a professional military class.
2. Predominance of the armed forces in the administration or policy of the state.
3. A policy in which military preparedness is of primary importance to a state.
America's Army certainly promotes #1, in fact that is it's primary goal, and arguably it promotes #3. Some people might of course claim that this is a good thing, that militarism is the backbone of a healthy national sentiment. But for some odd reason, I can't quite seem to agree with them, having at some point in my life glanced through a history textbook.