crazedgironemo wrote on Aug 8, 2024, 18:05:

Borderlands review: You won't find a better movie to make yourself miserable this year

My first reaction is that this reviewer has never watched any Uwe Boll movies...

I love certain Uwe Boll movies. They are so uniquely awful, made by someone probably certifiable, and are played so unironically straight and serious I have a blast watching them. Only Neil Breen is higher on my list.

Cutter wrote on Aug 8, 2024, 22:34:
Cate Blanchett? Really? I doubt she's even seen an actual video game much less Borderlands. So long as they make video game movies with actors who don't have the first clue about video games - much less the property they're working on - they're bound to fail. The only 2 famous actors on earth that have actual geek cred for gaming are Vin Diesel and Henry Cavill.

Ok, let's just have Vin Diesel and Henry Cavill play every role in every video game property! That's a smart and reasonable thing to say. Which gets to be Ellie in Last of Us season 2 and which replaces Pedro Pascal? Does this also count for video game voice acting, because most of those actors probably don't play the games, either!


Also, since Alec Guiness never traveled through space, we have to digitally edit him out of Star Wars and replace him with Buzz Aldrin.

Cutter wrote on Aug 8, 2024, 22:34:
Cate Blanchett? Really? I doubt she's even seen an actual video game much less Borderlands. So long as they make video game movies with actors who don't have the first clue about video games - much less the property they're working on - they're bound to fail. The only 2 famous actors on earth that have actual geek cred for gaming are Vin Diesel and Henry Cavill.

Typical. Blame the actor. You do realize that actors get paid to "act" for a living? I.E pretend they are a fictional character. As such they have to read from a script. So if a script is shit, or movie direction is equally shit, it's not the actor's job to somehow magically make the movie better.

Cutter wrote on Aug 8, 2024, 22:34:
Cate Blanchett? Really? I doubt she's even seen an actual video game much less Borderlands. So long as they make video game movies with actors who don't have the first clue about video games - much less the property they're working on - they're bound to fail. The only 2 famous actors on earth that have actual geek cred for gaming are Vin Diesel and Henry Cavill.

Terry Crews seen heading to Cutter's house to bitchslap him back to 1974.

Cate Blanchett? Really? I doubt she's even seen an actual video game much less Borderlands. So long as they make video game movies with actors who don't have the first clue about video games - much less the property they're working on - they're bound to fail. The only 2 famous actors on earth that have actual geek cred for gaming are Vin Diesel and Henry Cavill.

Borderlands review: You won't find a better movie to make yourself miserable this year

My first reaction is that this reviewer has never watched any Uwe Boll movies...

Riahderymnmaddog wrote on Aug 8, 2024, 16:52:

Prez wrote on Aug 8, 2024, 13:52:
I just looked up Sydney Sweeney. Holy canoli how did I not see THOSE in the movie?!? Was the movie so terrible that it deflated those divine, heavenly, spectacular... ahem. I mean to say, I had never heard of her before.

I had to google that, I did not know they still made these models either.

You need to watch Euphoria. https://www.imdb.com/name/nm2858875/

Prez wrote on Aug 8, 2024, 13:52:
I just looked up Sydney Sweeney. Holy canoli how did I not see THOSE in the movie?!? Was the movie so terrible that it deflated those divine, heavenly, spectacular... ahem. I mean to say, I had never heard of her before.

I had to google that, I did not know they still made these models either.

I just looked up Sydney Sweeney. Holy canoli how did I not see THOSE in the movie?!? Was the movie so terrible that it deflated those divine, heavenly, spectacular... ahem. I mean to say, I had never heard of her before.

I'm doing okay friend. I'm feeling awful today but I hope my son will play it with me when I'm not as bad.

Prez wrote on Aug 8, 2024, 13:36:
Thanks El Pit. But no one likes a smart ass sir.

Did... did you just call me... SMART?

Selective reception is my SUPERPOWER!

Hope you're alright, Prez.

Thanks El Pit. But no one likes a smart ass sir.

I'm going to ask my son if he wants to play it with me. He's the only gamer I know that is willing to play with a crippled idiot savant.

Burrito of Peace wrote on Aug 8, 2024, 12:00:

Prez wrote on Aug 8, 2024, 11:33:
I absolutely loved "Madame Web" because of how abysmally stupid it was. (Please don't see it - it might be worse than "Morbius").

Beyond being barrel bottom scrapings in terms of properties, that movie had Sydney Sweeney and her breasts in it. How do you squander those that badly? Though making Dakota Johnson the lead might as well have been the Bat-Signal for "this movie is going to suuuuuuuuuck".

Sydney Sweeney? Well, so there are two reasons to watch the movie... Nah, good, but not good enough.

Also: Prez, Abiotic Factor is currently 20% off in the Tiny Teams Sale over at Steam. Since you have almost no backlog and very few games on Steam, I thought that you might be interested.

Really unfortunate, they could have had some really creative shots, and mocked so many other movies... but instead it will be the one mocked.

God, that casting is one of the worst I've ever seen though. A handful of superfans could do better.

There's so much good film out there. Don't waste your brain-cells on trash.

Prez wrote on Aug 8, 2024, 11:33:
I absolutely loved "Madame Web" because of how abysmally stupid it was. (Please don't see it - it might be worse than "Morbius").

Beyond being barrel bottom scrapings in terms of properties, that movie had Sydney Sweeney and her breasts in it. How do you squander those that badly? Though making Dakota Johnson the lead might as well have been the Bat-Signal for "this movie is going to suuuuuuuuuck".

El Pit wrote on Aug 8, 2024, 10:54:
Borderlands had "failure" written all over it from the very start when they announced the casting. Maybe it is so bad that it might actually be entertaining? Like e.g. Battleship?

It sounds pretty awful. I can't wait! 🙂

I like when a show or movie is good. I like when a movie is "so bad it's good". The worst thing a movie can be is boring. They have me worried because they said that it's a lot of "shot/reverse shot". That's the most boring kind of cinematography which makes me kinda worried. I'm also worried about Jack Black as Claptrap. In the game Claptrap was a charming kind of annoying. Black tends to be the bad annoying though. We'll see.

I absolutely loved "Madame Web" because of how abysmally stupid it was. (Please don't see it - it might be worse than "Morbius"). It's disappointing that they couldn't make a 'Borderlands' movie genuinely fun and entertaining, but I still have hope.

This comment was edited on Aug 8, 2024, 11:48.

Borderlands had "failure" written all over it from the very start when they announced the casting. Maybe it is so bad that it might actually be entertaining? Like e.g. Battleship?