(The following is
Satire for Adults(
TM). Unborn children, and/or the stonehead monoliths on Easter Island, will definitely
not understand.)
Hi, I'm "Suck it Down" John Romero, here. Decades ago I designed a couple of levels in the John Carmack/id software release, "Doom," and ever since then I've been trying very hard to convince people it was
my game, all mine--ground up, every level, every line of code--eg, who
was J. Carmack, and who
cares? etc.
I mean, seriously, if you bought
Daikatana then I've already "
made you my bitch" (catchy, eh?) once, right? Second time's the charm! So get ready to go,
meh bitches!...Your Mast-ah (
Is it a wig or is it Romero?) calls! He
commands his
legion of mindless thralls to rise from the dead once again! Because...*off-key drum roll*...*sour trumpet blast*...
If I get enough
paid preorders, and I say
if, I
might actually develop a game, maybe even
Daikatana Remastered 2020,
and note that I say this without promising anything--or at least, I might hire the people who will develop the game--or I might wriggle in and ingratiate myself with the people who will actually develop the game--so long as I get all the credit, of course! It's all the same--
someone has to take the credit for things that get produced--so why not me? I've found that is a motto that works well for me, personally--always has, if you can't tell.
What? What's that you say? What was my all-time hunky-dory
delicious-mostest favorite thing about
Daikatana that to this day remains most loved by my swooning ocean of fans? Here's a hint--because if you haven't yet bought my masterpiece of yesteryear, here is
all I will say:
Talk to the frog...!
It is well known universally that I do not make mistakes--so, if you should happen across an error in that which I have written, please be assured that *I* did not write it!...:)