Beamer wrote on Jul 30, 2014, 13:57:
Well, the whole thing with "rape culture" is that you hear so much about what women should do to avoid being raped, but you rarely hear a guy being told "don't rape."
I rarely hear people being told not to murder other people either. But they still, in general, don't do it. Pretending men need education that rape is wrong is giving these fuckers a free pass. They know damn well its wrong. As does every guy who isn't a sociopath. With the exception of bumfuck Africa where some voodoo witchdoctor is telling everyone raping a virgin cures AIDS, rape isn't about ignorance or culture it's about being a shitty human being.
Yes, there are some things you can do that are stupid. If you drink, drive, and crash into a tree, you're stupid and your actions led to your suffering. If you go out to a bar, don't drink, drive home at 1:30 am and are hit by a drunk driver, yes, you could have avoided the roads when a significant portion of drivers are drunk, but does that mean that you deserve blame?
While it's statistically less safe to be driving in such a situation, there's not much you can do to avoid it other than just hiding in your house and forgoing a night out with friends.
Here's two different scenarios:
You're hit by a drunk driver, you weren't wearing your seatbelt.
You're hit by a drunk driver, you were out at 1:30AM and there were more drunk drivers on the street.
In the first scenario, you failed to take a basic safety precaution. You weren't being oppressed or discriminated against by being encouraged to wear a seatbelt. It's okay to expect people to take basic precautions to ensure their own safety.
In the second scenario, you took basic safety precautions. The only thing you could have done to avoid it is to refrain from taking part in a perfectly normal activity. It's NOT
okay to expect people to refrain from their normal day to day behaviors, or avoid having fun, because it's technically more risky.
This girl may have had sexual relations with a 29 year old at Comicon. And she may have then ended up beaten and bloody in a street. One of those does not inherently lead to the other. I'll wager more than a handful of guys here have ended up at a strange location having sex with someone they only just met. It didn't end up with them bloody in a street.
So to relate this girls situation to my previous example. It's okay to expect her to take basic precautions like distrusting strangers and sticking with a group. I try to take these same precautions at cons and sporting events and I am a large, strong male. It's NOT
okay to expect her to dress conservatively or forgo attendance at the event entirely.
One is a needless risk taking behavior that can be avoided without much trouble. The other isn't a significant risk factor and would place undue burden on the girl to avoid.
It's not black & white bro. Hiding in your house to avoid dying in a car accident is stupid, wearing your seatbelt to avoid dying in a car accident is smart.
"Sometimes, there are two sides. But more often, one side says it is a car. And one side says it is an umbrella. And only one is right. And the other one doesn’t deserve our attention." -Shepard Smith