Op Ed

Destructoid - How to respond to a videogame review.
If a videogame review that you disagree with is posted online, you are duty-bound to respond and shame the writer into committing suicide, because it's just that crucial. Of course, you need to be armed with the proper responses, and fortunately, we're here to help. Come with me as I show you exactly how to respond to a videogame review. That no-good writer who trashed Uncharted 2 by giving it an 8.5 will be crying into his oatmeal by sundown!

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1.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 10:15
1.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 10:15
Nov 10, 2009, 10:15
 
Destructoid is as juvenile as their audience. it's no suprise they get so many juvenile responses to their reviews
2.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 10:33
2.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 10:33
Nov 10, 2009, 10:33
 
If a publication gives a game a low score, one important thing you must do is to go through the archives and find other, arbitrarily chosen reviews of random videogames written by the same publication in the past. Even if the review is written by a totally different person, it doesn't matter. Just get those reviews and make pointless comparisons. It will somehow make everything better.

There are a number of things you do with these comparisons. You can claim that the publication is saying that one game is better than another game: "Wait, so you gave Brutal Legend a 6.0, but you gave Half-Minute Hero a 9.0? HOW is Half-Minute Hero better than Brutal Legend, which is what you totally just implied? These reviews are a joke."


This is very accurate.
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3.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 11:07
Verno
 
3.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 11:07
Nov 10, 2009, 11:07
 Verno
 
I don't really take reviews seriously in the first place, quite often the scores don't jive with the text and it's really just an opinion piece in the first place. I find a reviewer who seems to share my taste in games and generally go with what they say on titles where I've read nothing at all about them pre-release.
Playing: Baldur's Gate 3, Lufia & The Fortress of Doom, Diablo IV
Watching: Detroiters, The Bear, Foundation
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4.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 11:11
4.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 11:11
Nov 10, 2009, 11:11
 
If a videogame review that you disagree with is posted online, you are duty-bound to respond and shame the writer into committing suicide, because it's just that crucial.

awwwwwww.. did someone hurt his wittle feewings?

heres another tip: if someone posts responses to your review that cause you shame, GROW SOME BALLS AND FUCKING GET OVER IT
5.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 11:13
Verno
 
5.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 11:13
Nov 10, 2009, 11:13
 Verno
 
One day you're going to post something that's not worthless e-toughguy tripe. One day.
Playing: Baldur's Gate 3, Lufia & The Fortress of Doom, Diablo IV
Watching: Detroiters, The Bear, Foundation
Avatar 51617
6.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 11:23
6.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 11:23
Nov 10, 2009, 11:23
 
I don't bother with most video game reviews, especially ones that are posted on sites like Destructoid. I also don't bother with any video game review that comes out in the first week after the game is released.
7.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 11:39
7.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 11:39
Nov 10, 2009, 11:39
 
One day you're going to post something that's not worthless e-toughguy tripe. One day.

and im gonna do it just for you, cool guy - because you're special

8.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 11:42
8.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 11:42
Nov 10, 2009, 11:42
 
One day you're going to post something that's not worthless e-toughguy tripe. One day.

Don't you just love e-thugs?
Do you have a single fact to back that up?
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9.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 11:44
Verno
 
9.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 11:44
Nov 10, 2009, 11:44
 Verno
 
and im gonna do it just for you, cool guy - because you're special

Maybe on my birthday or something, that would be a treat.
Playing: Baldur's Gate 3, Lufia & The Fortress of Doom, Diablo IV
Watching: Detroiters, The Bear, Foundation
Avatar 51617
10.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 11:47
10.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 11:47
Nov 10, 2009, 11:47
 
i love e-coolguys

they are so witty and cool
11.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 11:52
Verno
 
11.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 11:52
Nov 10, 2009, 11:52
 Verno
 
I'm untrollable but you're welcome to keep trying.
Playing: Baldur's Gate 3, Lufia & The Fortress of Doom, Diablo IV
Watching: Detroiters, The Bear, Foundation
Avatar 51617
12.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 12:02
12.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 12:02
Nov 10, 2009, 12:02
 
yeh you're amazing, im so impressed - really
13.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 12:14
Verno
 
13.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 12:14
Nov 10, 2009, 12:14
 Verno
 
You're not exactly difficult to impress I imagine
Playing: Baldur's Gate 3, Lufia & The Fortress of Doom, Diablo IV
Watching: Detroiters, The Bear, Foundation
Avatar 51617
14.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 12:38
14.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 12:38
Nov 10, 2009, 12:38
 
You're not exactly difficult to impress I imagine

I hear if you give him a rolled up ball of tinfoil he'll be impressed and amused for days.
Do you have a single fact to back that up?
Avatar 43041
15.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 12:46
15.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 12:46
Nov 10, 2009, 12:46
 
so witty!
16.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 13:38
16.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 13:38
Nov 10, 2009, 13:38
 
I'd just like to pop in and say that sometimes the comment sections here are worse than the gametrailers, youtube or Escapist ones.
17.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 13:55
Verno
 
17.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 13:55
Nov 10, 2009, 13:55
 Verno
 
Our grammar is better surely
Playing: Baldur's Gate 3, Lufia & The Fortress of Doom, Diablo IV
Watching: Detroiters, The Bear, Foundation
Avatar 51617
18.
 
Re: Op Ed
Nov 10, 2009, 14:10
18.
Re: Op Ed Nov 10, 2009, 14:10
Nov 10, 2009, 14:10
 
bad article -- it basically summarizes what "professional" (cough) game reviewers say to each other around the lunch table so that they feel better.
19.
 
Re: Game Reviews
Nov 10, 2009, 14:37
19.
Re: Game Reviews Nov 10, 2009, 14:37
Nov 10, 2009, 14:37
 
Because of Mr. Smith's attitude I usually don't respond to his publicity stunts, but this time I'll make an exception. Let us note first of all that if Smith doesn't like it here, then perhaps he should go elsewhere. Most members of our quick-fix, sugar-rush, attention-deficit society are too impatient to realize the importance of complaining about the worst sorts of addlepated Machiavellians there are. I wish only that a few more people could see that Smith is terrified that there might be an absolute reality outside himself, a reality that is what it is, regardless of his wishes, theories, hopes, daydreams, or decrees. I overheard one of his subordinates say, "Everything Smith says is utterly and absolutely true." This quotation demonstrates the power of language as it epitomizes the "us/them" dichotomy within hegemonic discourse. As for me, I prefer to use language to take steps against the whole juvenile, shameless brotherhood of the worst types of rebarbative lamebrains I've ever seen. The moral of the story: We are now stuck with a sanguinary mercantalism bearing a human faceā€”that of Mr. Smith.

hhttp://www.pakin.org/complaint/



This comment was edited on Nov 10, 2009, 14:41.
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20.
 
Re: Game Reviews
Nov 10, 2009, 15:36
PHJF
 
20.
Re: Game Reviews Nov 10, 2009, 15:36
Nov 10, 2009, 15:36
 PHJF
 
Comments at gametrailers rarely if ever amount to so much as coherent thoughts. At least the shitslinging that goes on around here is generally focused and comprehensible.
Steam + PSN: PHJF
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