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User information for D Stone

Real Name D Stone   
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Nickname SlimRam
Email Concealed by request
Description
Homepage http://
Signed On February 18, 2012
Supporter -
Total Comments 1337 (Pro)
User ID 57335
 
User comment history
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News Comments > Frontier Layoffs

15. Re: Frontier Layoffs Dec 17, 2012, 17:29 SlimRam
 
Lady perhaps? *counting heads* and Gentlemen, allow me to paraphrase a bit here, ahem:

"My name is David Braben and i'd like to take FULL CREDIT for creating the hugely popular PC title 'Elite'. There was the other fuck-face named....uh....Ian...oh shit what was his name...oh yes Ian Bell, but he's not really important..it's ALL about me. I have rode the success of this title since the 80's and i'm STILL RIDIN' HARD!

I needed MONEY people...LOTS OF IT! Soooooo I basically hired 14 people randomly off the street to fill in slots, called my company 'Frontier Developments' (which was honestly just ME all along) and started a kickstarter. Well, you cheap fucks haven't apparently noticed the the God before you and my pubic funding is failing.

Unfortunately I am now going to fire the 14 homeless people that I hired and will be calling it 'restructuring'. PLEASE don't worry, 'Frontier Developments' will continue doing what it has been doing with the money that we have....and that would be nothing.

Thanks for the laughs (mainly to the bank) and the fish (god rest you Douglas Adams)".

David 'Davie B' Braben
 
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News Comments > Yerli on Crysis 3's Superior Graphics

20. Re: Yerli on Crysis 3's Superior Graphics Dec 15, 2012, 02:15 SlimRam
 
Creston wrote on Dec 15, 2012, 01:21:
SlimRam wrote on Dec 14, 2012, 23:07:
BRING IT YERLI, MY SYSTEM IS READY!!!

*Pops open the side panel on my 'puter and slides a few EXTRA grapes to the hamster running on the wheel powering my box while whispering, "yeah Mr. Puddles....we'll SHOW them performance...won't we boy..."*


How many Hertz (resolutions per minute) does Mr. Puddles run at with those extra grapes? He must be breaking the magical 5.0 barrier?

Creston

I actually still have a 'Turbo' button on my machine when I need the extra performance...

It basically just projects an image of Richard Gere's ass in front of the hamster, then the Hertz really start to soar! Weird ain't it?

This comment was edited on Dec 15, 2012, 02:24.
 
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News Comments > Yerli on Crysis 3's Superior Graphics

13. Re: Yerli on Crysis 3's Superior Graphics Dec 14, 2012, 23:07 SlimRam
 
BRING IT YERLI, MY SYSTEM IS READY!!!

*Pops open the side panel on my 'puter and slides a few EXTRA grapes to the hamster running on the wheel powering my box while whispering, "yeah Mr. Puddles....we'll SHOW them performance...won't we boy..."*

 
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News Comments > "All Hands on Deck" for New Mass Effect 3 DLC

8. Re: Dec 5, 2012, 23:10 SlimRam
 
No no, I heard from a REAL inside source, here's the deal:

You decide to throw one last HUGE party before the final push to the teleportation beam at the end. You (Shepard) wake up in your bunk aboard the Normandy after a druken night of passionate abandon to find Javik in your bed, dressed in a pink nighty... Drummer

.....And THAT, REAAAAAAALY changes the ending..... Love2

This comment was edited on Dec 5, 2012, 23:30.
 
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News Comments > Far Cry 3 Released; Patched

12. Re: Far Cry 3 Released; Patched Dec 4, 2012, 23:07 SlimRam
 
I was a fan of FC1 and I believe I was one of the 12 people that actually liked FC2 so to get FC3 was a no-brainer. I've got atleast 6 hours in the game and haven't played but probably 2 main missions and am having a BLAST! I have a poo-poo system and it still seems quite lovely. A nice example is this short retard adventure by yours truly:

I'm driving flat out in a local beater, coming around a corner and there is a fellow 'brother warrior' standing on a bridge... I hit the handbrake to try to miss him but CLEANLY wipe him off the bridge with the back of the car...also as I fly through the wood railing of the bridge and fall into a gulley...upside down. I get out and look at my upside down car as I hear growling behind me....it's a VERY unhappy pack of rabid dogs...Yep they attack, we fight, I kill, VICTORY! Then I realize you can push your car over; do so and jump back in. I gun it up the side of the gully, becoming slightly airbourne as I hear the thunk of something hitting my car....I nailed a pig making my gully exit. I hear the whine of the pig as it lands on the hood of my car and glitches there for a few seconds as I continue down the road. I would like to imagine the local people calling me an "asshole" in they're native tongue as they watch the spectacle from the side of the road... As the pig flies off the hood I look over at the little hula bobble on the dash bouncing around and smile to myself....THIS is MY kind of GAMING!
 
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News Comments > etc., etc.

1. Re: etc., etc. Dec 3, 2012, 20:50 SlimRam
 
Molyneux backtracks on claim he will only make "one more game"

My GOD, now the man cannot even keep THE MOST IMPORTANT FEATURE of any Molyneux game thus far....

His claim that he will only make one more game....
 
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News Comments > Op Ed

14. Re: Op Ed Nov 24, 2012, 18:15 SlimRam
 
I'm fine with the Kickstarter model for non-pay-to-win games. I've funded quite a few games, the only ones I won't are the pay-to-win ones like Star Citizen.

If I won the lottery, you'd see my name on all the inns/planets/etc I'd rather see someone's name than the name of a company.

Hmmmm....Planet Julio... I LIKE IT!
 
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News Comments > Op Ed

10. Re: Op Ed Nov 24, 2012, 18:05 SlimRam
 
He's just butt-hurt because when he invested in the Elite kickstarter to GET his own planet, David Braben told him that 'Frontier Developments' couldn't oblidge a planet named 'Cliffski' because is just sounded too damn silly  
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News Comments > PlanetSide 2 Launches

4. Re: PlanetSide 2 Launches Nov 20, 2012, 22:32 SlimRam
 
I've got to give this a go; Hell I need a new game to make me feel 'combat ineffective' and generally get pwned by 12 year-olds with disturbing regularity besides Battlefield 3

Downloading now
 
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News Comments > Star Citizen's Record Funding Drive Ends

4. Re: Star Citizen's Record Funding Drive Ends Nov 19, 2012, 21:27 SlimRam
 
Now all he needs is a well-known video game producer with a outstanding track record for taking a huge chunk of cash and putting it to good use......I dunno...i'm thinkin':

George Broussard

 
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News Comments > Star Citizen Kickstarter Reaches for the Stars

53. Let Us Just Remember 3 Words: Nov 19, 2012, 18:37 SlimRam
 
Wing Commander Movie....

Ok ok I KNOW that was a low blow but.....

THAT is what CAN HAPPEN when MILLIONS of dollars are being thrown around; I mean Chris Roberts WAS the director....

Jus sayin

No but seriously, God bless the man for trying this, if I hadn't have lost my money on hookers and blow I would have tried to kick money his direction. I cannot wait for this game and will be absolutely wooden (think mahogany....or more like balsa) um...anyway till this comes out!

P.S. They REALLY need to bring back the Full Motion Video of the old games to really clinch this. I want to tell Maniac to fuck off/ not fuck off just one more time
 
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News Comments > Star Citizen Passes $4.2MM

12. Re: Star Citizen Passes $4.2MM Nov 17, 2012, 17:38 SlimRam
 
Well dammit, at the 200MM dollar mark when I buy the game it better come with a full working cockpit on hydraulics with...with a real Star Citizen Uniform...and voice recognition so I can scream out, "STAY ON TARGET PORKINS!!!" drunk, at 5 AM to the pounding of my neighbors on the walls. With a beer holder and an ashtray. And OFCOURSE a working toilet because I'M GOING TO PLAY THIS DAMN GAME FOR DAYS!!!!

Flush
 
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News Comments > Morning Tech Bits

7. Re: Morning Tech Bits Nov 9, 2012, 21:02 SlimRam
 
  • New Intel Itanium Processor 9500 Delivers Breakthrough Capabilities for Mission-Critical Computing

  • Huh, and I always just called it,
    Surfing-For Porn
     
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    News Comments > MoH SEAL Consultants Reprimanded

    29. Re: MoH SEAL Consultants Reprimanded Nov 9, 2012, 20:23 SlimRam
     
    This is obviously more about sea men. Let's just face it, talking about real sea men and what sea men techniques are used in the real world is what this is all about. The sea men came forth with this load of information of they're own free hand will. We should not sugar coat the sea men or make light of the ejaculation of this information upon the general public. Ofcourse the Navy now is the one with a load on they're face, and they had to bust-a-nut to cover the consequences of this huge boner. Frankly the situation is a bit hard to swallow and I imagine the Navy is going to be cleaning up this mess for awhile...  
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    News Comments > Disney Acquires LucasArts

    24. Re: Disney Acquires LucasArts Oct 31, 2012, 17:36 SlimRam
     
    TOO CYNICAL???

    Yeah, RIGHT!!!
     
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    News Comments > Disney Acquires LucasArts

    14. Re: Disney Acquires LucasArts Oct 31, 2012, 16:50 SlimRam
     
    finally!

    now I can finally get that Mickey mouse/Lego/Star Wars/Space Mountain/yoda speak/epic Pluto adventure_roleplaying_sex simulator that I have been having gas pains over and losing sleep over not being able to buy.

    how could there be ANY down side to this????
     
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    News Comments > Steam Halloween Sale

    3. Re: Steam Halloween Sale Oct 29, 2012, 20:51 SlimRam
     
    I'm thinking that during thanksgiving Steam will also be having a sale on games that were turkeys so......

    RAGE better be damn NEAR FREE!
     
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    News Comments > Steam Halloween Sale

    1. Re: Steam Halloween Sale Oct 29, 2012, 20:40 SlimRam
     
    no nO NO!!!!!!

    NO MORE SALES, DEALS, OR BARGAINS DAMMIT, I CAN'T TAKE IT!!!!

    * Rips my ponytail off and strangles myself with it squeeking out, "damn....you......steam..." *
     
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    News Comments > RAGE Mod Tools Still Coming

    17. "Are These The Tools That.....?" Oct 24, 2012, 23:46 SlimRam
     
    Ok, i'll start this:

    "Convert the engine back to the ultra superior Quake III engine!?!?" Rotfl
     
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    News Comments > NVIDIA Beta Drivers

    13. Re: You and your high resolutions... Oct 24, 2012, 23:19 SlimRam
     
    I game (if you can REALLY call my ability to suck at everything I TRY to play) with a standard 4 year old HP comp, a 550ti nvidia card that I bought used.....um...OH YES, and the amazing powerhouse 19" VERY USED Dell monitor that I bought from Goodwill for 15 dollars about 6 years ago. Oh, and every now and then the picture reduces to a single white line...usually during a MOST inappropriate time like when im surfing for porn or losing my entire squad in XCOM. Oh and I just realized a year ago that the monitor supported 1600 x 1200 res...i had been playing everything at 1024 x 768....So YES, my computer penis is ENORMOUS!  
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