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21. Re: PR wisdom from Derek Apr 19, 2005, 18:45 Prez
 
Oh wait, you have to actually have a brain to do that.

Ouch!!


 
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20. Re: PR wisdom from Derek Apr 19, 2005, 09:08 Creston
 
Gahhhhh, I KNEW this would be about Derek Smart...

You gotta give him credit, tho... That guy knows how to complete a game and get it on the market- as crappy as they are.

That's true. In the time that Valve and George Broussard's monkeys have released exactly one game, I think Derek Smart has shoved no less than five different pieces of ... hmmm ... code on the market.

Which in itself, is impressive. But then you realise that he manages to do so because his games are invariably bugfilled and almost never run at all well on anyone's computer, and that he and his "guys" flatout refuse to give tech support to anyone.

For all his yapping about how burned out he is about everything, I wonder why he doesn't just stop? Go build rockets like Carmack or something.
Oh wait, you have to actually have a brain to do that.

Creston


 
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19. Re: PR wisdom from Derek Apr 19, 2005, 06:33 Bronco
 
I'm sure Derek's trained attack dog Hellbinder will be along any minute to explain things to you in his patent-pending non-confrontational manner. And remind you of his system specs.

Think he's fixed his .sig yet?



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18. Re: Breaking the law... Apr 19, 2005, 00:37 Prez
 
Okay, so the guy has historically been an ass. Can't I still like his games? Please?

 
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17. Re: PR wisdom from Derek Apr 19, 2005, 00:36 Camaro76
 
Seems a little low to me....I must be missing something.

I'm sure Derek's trained attack dog Hellbinder will be along any minute to explain things to you in his patent-pending non-confrontational manner. And remind you of his system specs.

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16. Re: Breaking the law... Apr 18, 2005, 22:33 MeatForce
 
"We [3000AD Inc] don't particularly want to receive emails asking us what a vertex shader is and where it can be downloaded. After a year of having to field that crap, I'm burned out. In fact, I have advised my guys to just IGNORE any/all such queries that come through the tech support list/email. If you don't know what a shader is by now, there is a very good chance that my games weren't developed for you."


So uh... you guys feel like starting a letter-writing campaign?

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I'm not even angry. I'm being so sincere right now, even though you broke my heart and killed me.
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15. Re: Breaking the law... Apr 18, 2005, 21:48 Prez
 
GODDAMMED FRICKIN" PIECE OF CRAP BUSTED EDIT BUTTON!!GRR!!

Whew! Anyway, my last post was supposed to say:

I'm hoping I'm not breaking the law, but I have to admit I've liked each and every Derek Smart release I have played. BC3000AD after much patching, of course! Please don't ostracize me! At least I don't like him much...

 
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14. Breaking the law... Apr 18, 2005, 21:43 Prez
 


 
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13. Re: The Summoning Apr 18, 2005, 20:51 Michael Bolton's hair dresser
 
The fire has come out of the bluesnews community! Where are all of the Smart-haters? 11 posts? (Well 12,now actually) PATHETIC!!

It was posted under "etc" so it's kinda like a fart in the wind. OTOH remember when HL2 went gold, the good doktor couldn't handle having a triple A title getting all the attention so he had to release a blurb about one of his turds going gold.

 
Dr. Michael Bolton's Hairdreser PhD, MD, LLP, DDS
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12. Re: The Summoning Apr 18, 2005, 19:34 Prez
 
The fire has come out of the bluesnews community! Where are all of the Smart-haters? 11 posts? (Well 12,now actually) PATHETIC!!

 
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11. Re: The Summoning Apr 18, 2005, 19:26 cappy
 
If the Summoning doesn't work, maybe invoking Smart's old nemesis Chet from OldManMurray might work:

http://www.oldmanmurray.com/news/315.html

In other interview news, the normally reclusive Dr. Derek Smart, PhD has taken time out from working on fifteen different games all about operating a spreadsheet in space to announce that he has licensed Croteam's Serious Engine. What's he going to use it for? Beats him. It appears to have been an impulse buy. However, that hasn't stopped him from going on an interview rampage. In the last four days, no less than ten interviews have appeared with the man so dangerously smart the Government made him put the word right in his name. In each interview, he's asked to provide some details about the mystery game, codenamed Project ABC. Here's a typical answer taken from an interview on game-interviews.com:

Question: how long have you been thinking about this game and how long has Project ABC been in development?

Smart: I have been thinking about Project ABC, all of this past weekend.

All weekend? Intriguing. Don't get me wrong, though. I give Derek some crap, but as a gamer I want nothing more than for Dr. Smart, PhD to come through and release a great game for me to play, because, ultimately, that's what it's all about.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Oh man... I'm kidding of course. I just love it when people say things like that. I want to see a train wreck so powerful that the moon gets blown up. And in case any of you developers are wondering whether to take Smart's side in all this, here's a quote from the same game-interviews.com piece:

I'm used to developing and coding high-end migraine inducing modules for my games, therefore, going to a streamlined and less hardcore game, just gives my brain some breathing room...

After the Battlecruiser series, believe me, anything else not even closely related to its complexity, will be like programming tic-tac-toe to me [and my enormous brain]

In other words, the regular games that all of you average developers have worked so hard to patch to the point where they almost do the things it says they should do on the box are mere child's play to Dr. Smart. In more other words, you're idiots. Once Smart's brain - which has apparently evolved its own set of lungs and perhaps even its own tiny brain - gets "some breathing room", you can all use your primitive computer skills to design in Notepad then laser print signs that say "out of business".

 
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10. The Summoning Apr 18, 2005, 18:17 mag
 
C'mon, you slackers. Get on the ball.

Derek Smart. Derek Smart! DEREK SMART!

 
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9. No subject Apr 18, 2005, 16:51 space captain
 
nobody's said it yet

so much money, where does it all come from? we're paying for democracy, never mind the bomb... so much money, what does it do? it puts them in power where they shit on you

- Subhumans
 
Go forth, and kill!
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8. Re: PR wisdom from Derek Apr 18, 2005, 14:24 Bronco
 
From the same forum thread:

So, now that UC has reached its End Of Life, once UCAWA goes online, we will be dropping the UC servers and hosting UCAWA on them. So there should be a total of six high-end 32 player public servers and two private fleet servers available on day one for UCAWA.

Is this a multiplayer game or single? If it's primary purpose is MP - then they have server capacity for 256 people on the day of release?

Seems a little low to me....I must be missing something.

-TPFKAS2S
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7. Re: PR wisdom from Derek Apr 18, 2005, 13:31 WebDemon
 
"Actually..looking through that forum, Smart announced it Gold. So now we can all go out and get it.'

AWSOME! Now if I can just find the damned vertex shaders....
Oh well I guess this game wasn't developed for a retard like me...

What a fucking assclown. And he wonder why he's a joke.
Then again he DOES have a Phd, so he MUST know what he's doing right?


 
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6. Re: PR wisdom from Derek Apr 18, 2005, 13:01 Taulin
 
Actually..looking through that forum, Smart announced it Gold. So now we can all go out and get it.

 
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5. Re: PR wisdom from Derek Apr 18, 2005, 12:53 Taulin
 
Man, that is a great quote. And he still wonders why people view him as a pompus prick...

 
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4. Read it too fast... Apr 18, 2005, 12:06 ILL Robinson
 
my first read of the UC blurb came across as: "indicate that 3000AD's latest space sim is on the verge of being declared old..."

hehehehe...

 
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3. Re: PR wisdom from Derek Apr 18, 2005, 11:51 BIGtrouble77
 
You gotta give him credit, tho... That guy knows how to complete a game and get it on the market- as crappy as they are.

 
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2. Re: PR wisdom from Derek Apr 18, 2005, 10:26 Eraserhead
 
And game publishers, and the press, and the general public, and...

 
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