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Out of the Blue

Today is Presidents' Day here in the U.S., where we celebrate our nation's leadership with low, low prices on mattresses. Actually, technically today is still the celebration of George Washington's birthday, as the federal holiday has never been officially changed. The idea of using the occasion to honor the legacy of all the country's previous leaders came from Richard M. Nixon, which probably qualifies as ironic, since Nixon typically ranks very high on polls ranking the worst presidents. Following that theme, and avoiding any living presidents to forestall needless political controversy, I will use my presidents' day to remember the dubious accomplishments of some consensus worst presidents: Nixon, Frankin Pierce, James Buchanan, Ulysses S. Grant, Andrew Johnson, and of course, Warren G. Harding.

R.I.P.: Embattled country star Mindy McCready dead at 37 of apparent suicide.

Presidential Links: Thanks Ant and Acleacius.
Play: Ode to Pixel Days.
Science: Scientists unveil new detectors in race to save Earth from next asteroid.
Media: Show us your war (dog) face! Thanks reddit.
Gangnam~Style Cockatoo.
Baby boy laughs like dolphin!.
Follow-up: Showtime, Punxsutawney Phil.

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8. Re: New asteroid detector? Feb 18, 2013, 11:20 Creston
 
nin wrote on Feb 18, 2013, 11:17:
Armengar wrote on Feb 18, 2013, 11:13:
Why bother with an asteroid detector? It isnt like we can do anything useful about them. They either burn up or obliterate the earth. Pretty much the only options with our firepower.


Look, we have to do something. What if we took one of the retired space shuttles, and got the biggest, baddest group of roughnecks we could find (minus PapaBear, god rest)? Then, we send them up with a shitload of explosives, while Aerosmith does a concert as they take off? Then they rig the explosives, and if for some reason they can't be remotely detonated, we get some old fucker to sacrifice himself for all of humanity.

It's better than nothing, right?


Hey, if we need to send someone up to save humanity, I'll sure as fuck send Bruce Willis before I send Terry Bradshaw Robert Duvall! What if there had been aliens on that asteroid? Bruce Willis would have kicked their ass!

The Aerosmith concert as they take off thing practically made me gigglesnort with laughter, though.

Creston
 
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7. Re: New asteroid detector? Feb 18, 2013, 11:18 Creston
 
Armengar wrote on Feb 18, 2013, 11:13:
Why bother with an asteroid detector?

Grant money, sadly. The one in Russia has put asteroids back in the common mindset, so some dipshit politician somewhere will "make it his platform", give some scientists with an "asteroid detector" (ie, a telescope) a lot of money, and taaadaaaa! Voters appeased!

I guess it's marginally more useful than those two numbnuts who got grant money for "trying to calculate the weight of the Universe."

Creston
 
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6. Re: New asteroid detector? Feb 18, 2013, 11:17 nin
 
Armengar wrote on Feb 18, 2013, 11:13:
Why bother with an asteroid detector? It isnt like we can do anything useful about them. They either burn up or obliterate the earth. Pretty much the only options with our firepower.


Look, we have to do something. What if we took one of the retired space shuttles, and got the biggest, baddest group of roughnecks we could find (minus PapaBear, god rest)? Then, we send them up with a shitload of explosives, while Aerosmith does a concert as they take off? Then they rig the explosives, and if for some reason they can't be remotely detonated, we get some old fucker (besides Stephen Tyler, he's still back on the ground, screeching) to sacrifice himself for all of humanity.

It's better than nothing, right?

This comment was edited on Feb 18, 2013, 11:24.
 
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5. New asteroid detector? Feb 18, 2013, 11:13 Armengar
 
Why bother with an asteroid detector? It isnt like we can do anything useful about them. They either burn up or obliterate the earth. Pretty much the only options with our firepower.  
Its not the cough that carries you off but the coffin they carry you off in.
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4. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 18, 2013, 10:08 nin
 

To even things out - because we were short a holiday up here compared to the US - they gave us "Family Day". I have no idea what it means


So it's like the Wookie "Life Day"?

 
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3. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 18, 2013, 10:05 Cutter
 
To even things out - because we were short a holiday up here compared to the US - they gave us "Family Day". I have no idea what it means but if we were picking days for holidays most people would choose Halloween I'm sure.
 
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"Bye weeks? Bronko Nagurski didn't get no bye weeks, and now he's deadů Well, maybe they're a good thing." - Moe
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2. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 18, 2013, 10:01 Creston
 
Having only been in the US for Bush and Obama, so far I can't say that President's Day fills me with much patriotic glee, though I of course understand that it's more Congress and the Senate's fault that the country is going to shit. There's only so much the President can do / not do, after all.

So here's to Ronnie Raygun, who was president when I was a wee little lad, and I still thought that America was the land of great mystery and pure MAGIC.

nin wrote on Feb 18, 2013, 08:45:
Today is Presidents' Day here in the U.S., where we celebrate the legacy of our nation's leadership with low, low prices on mattresses.

Sofa King low?!?!


Come on, nin. The President can't do miracles.

Creston
 
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1. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 18, 2013, 08:45 nin
 
Today is Presidents' Day here in the U.S., where we celebrate the legacy of our nation's leadership with low, low prices on mattresses.

Sofa King low?!?!

 
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