Send News. Want a reply? Read this. More in the FAQ.   News Forum - All Forums - Mobile - PDA - RSS Headlines  RSS Headlines   Twitter  Twitter
Customize
User Settings
Styles:
LAN Parties
Upcoming one-time events:

Regularly scheduled events

Out of the Blue

MrsBlue called me downstairs in a panic this morning because she couldn't find her keys. I kidded her as I always do on such occasions that I keep meaning to suggest that she keep them in the same place at all times to avoid this (the joke being I've suggested this a thousand times already). She objected that this is what she does, saying that she leaves them right there on the corner of the table where my keys were sitting, to which I replied that she'd obviously left her keys outside in the lock. When she found them there, she asked how I knew, and I told her that I had left my keys in the inside lock, so it struck me she had unlocked the door with her keys and locked it with mine before leaving them on her designated spot on the table. That's me, Stephen "Blue" Heaslip, consulting detective. Sherlock Holmes probably has nothing to worry about yet, but I think I've surpassed Jonathan Ames, and am on my way to Encyclopedia Brown status. Bugs Meany beware!

Detected Links: Thanks Ant and Mike Martinez and Acleacius.
Play: Reach The Star.
Zomblower.
Ninja Hamsters vs Robots.
Link: The Coolest Locksmith Shop in New York City. Thanks Boing Boing.
Stories: Doner kebab saves bloke's life. Thanks Slashdot.
Naked Lady Cooking Show Coming to Hong Kong.
Goose Island And Longman & Eagle Unveil Their Pork Soda. No military discount?
Science: Diet soda tied to stroke risk, but reasons unclear.
Valley Christian High School High School Students' Space Station Experiment Taking Off.
Images: Have A Productive Snow Day.
Frozen Firefox.
Media: Superman Spoof Of The Day.
The Experiment - The Beginning. Interactive video storytelling.
Snow goes boom.
Photographer captures huge roadside bomb explosion in Kirkuk.
The Funnies: Brevity.
Follow-up: "Making of" the Star Wars Darth Vader Volkswagen commercial.

View
37 Replies. 2 pages. Viewing page 1.
< Newer [ 1 2 ] Older >

37. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 11, 2011, 11:58 Ratty
 
Cutter wrote on Feb 10, 2011, 21:28:
Maybe the biochemical warfare agent - aspartame - has something to do with it as well? It still boggles my mind people consume that stuff.
Oh please. That's such an old myth. The *only* place you'll see that repeated is on the various pseudoscience health sites where you'll also find screeds on how vaccines cause autism.
 
Avatar 22908
 
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
36. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 11, 2011, 09:26 MxxCon
 
Ant wrote on Feb 10, 2011, 18:50:
Ratty wrote on Feb 10, 2011, 10:49:
Redwood wrote on Feb 10, 2011, 10:26:
Hah! You two are hilarious. I put my keys in the same place so I don't lose them. It serves me well.
Their called pockets folks. Seriously, doesn't anybody have pockets anymore?
What happens when you do laundry? I would forget.
hey! stop destroying the environment! combine laundry with shower!
 
Avatar 21874
 
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
35. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 11, 2011, 08:25 sauron
 
Cutter wrote on Feb 10, 2011, 21:28:
Maybe the biochemical warfare agent - aspartame - has something to do with it as well? It still boggles my mind people consume that stuff.

That's true. Stay safe, drink beer instead!
 
Avatar 8692
 
Kittens!
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
34. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 11, 2011, 07:55 kanniballl
 
SpectralMeat wrote on Feb 10, 2011, 12:48:

During the day keys in the pockets are of course different, I have my keys in my pocket during the day at work etc., but when I get home I take everything out of my pocket keys, cellphone, money etc., then I change clothes and the last thing I want is anything in my pockets.


Ditto

In my case, it's because I will often lay down on the couch and don't want to worry about sticking myself with the keys or rolling over and activating my car's "panic" button.

 
"Space. It seems to go on and on forever. But then you get to the end and a gorilla starts throwing barrels at you."
-Fry, Futurama
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
33. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 10, 2011, 23:39 xXBatmanXx
 
nin wrote on Feb 10, 2011, 12:22:
I do find it odd that you have a lock that requires a key to be used from the inside.

Dual cylindar locks are more secure than single....

Actually Blue's is one of the few excuses that makes sense. If you have an armload of grocery's or something I can see that happening. Leaving the keys in the lock. I've done that.

I always have safety on my mind, and never have full arms when going to and from the door. I would rather make an extra trip to the garage to get whatever I couldn't carry rather than have both hands undable to protect myself.

I keep my wallet, keys, phone, gun with eachother at times. And they are always in 1 of 3 places together. Kitchen counter, desk, bed side. Makes it easy. And I hate things in my pockets. I wear jackets and outerwear so that I don't have anything in my pants pockets. It is annoying to sit on things or dig in pockets.

This comment was edited on Feb 10, 2011, 23:47.
 
Avatar 10714
 
In this present crisis, government is not the solution to our problem; government is the problem. / Few men have virtue enough to withstand the highest bidder.
Playing: New dad
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
32. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 10, 2011, 21:28 Cutter
 
Maybe the biochemical warfare agent - aspartame - has something to do with it as well? It still boggles my mind people consume that stuff.

 
Avatar 25394
 
"The South will boogie again!" - Disco Stu
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
31. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 10, 2011, 21:17 banddirector
 

Longswd wrote on Feb 10, 2011, 18:19:
Diet soda tied to stroke risk, but reasons unclear.

The "reason" is correlative, not causative. People who drink diet soda are concerned about their weight. If they are concerned about their weight it's likely with good reason, i.e. they are heavy. If they are heavy, they have an increased risk of heart disease and stroke.

Is the logic really so torturous that this needs to be explained?


Well put - - I was thinking the exact same thing ....

 
There's no place like 127.0.0.1
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
30. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 10, 2011, 19:10 Ant
 
Ratty wrote on Feb 10, 2011, 19:05:
Ant wrote on Feb 10, 2011, 18:50:
What happens when you do laundry? I would forget.
Who washes pants? Seriously, I wash my pants maybe once every couple of months.
I do it weekly.
 
Avatar 1957
 
Ant @ The Ant Farm: http://antfarm.ma.cx and Ant's Quality Foraged Links: http://aqfl.net ...
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
29. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 10, 2011, 19:05 Ratty
 
Ant wrote on Feb 10, 2011, 18:50:
What happens when you do laundry? I would forget.
Who washes pants? Seriously, I wash my pants maybe once every couple of months.
 
Avatar 22908
 
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
28. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 10, 2011, 18:50 Ant
 
Ratty wrote on Feb 10, 2011, 10:49:
Redwood wrote on Feb 10, 2011, 10:26:
Hah! You two are hilarious. I put my keys in the same place so I don't lose them. It serves me well.
Their called pockets folks. Seriously, doesn't anybody have pockets anymore?
What happens when you do laundry? I would forget.
 
Avatar 1957
 
Ant @ The Ant Farm: http://antfarm.ma.cx and Ant's Quality Foraged Links: http://aqfl.net ...
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
27. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 10, 2011, 18:30 Dades
 
We have a basket beside the door that is specifically for keys and another beside it for electronic devices. The basket cost about a dollar and has saved us countless frustrating hours of hunting for keys, cell phones and ipods.  
Avatar 54452
 
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
26. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 10, 2011, 18:19 Longswd
 
Diet soda tied to stroke risk, but reasons unclear.

The "reason" is correlative, not causative. People who drink diet soda are concerned about their weight. If they are concerned about their weight it's likely with good reason, i.e. they are heavy. If they are heavy, they have an increased risk of heart disease and stroke.

Is the logic really so torturous that this needs to be explained?

 
I don't always drink carbonated Mexican rat piss, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis.
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
25. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 10, 2011, 16:23 Sepharo
 
My apartment door locks behind me so I always keep my keys in my jacket pocket. In the summer I just need to tap my pockets more carefully before I leave.

Keys - Phone - Wallet Go!
 
Avatar 17249
 
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
24. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 10, 2011, 15:32 PHJF
 
I keep my keys right next to my phone right next to my glasses right next to my ipod right next to my wallet. If I lose one, chances are it will cause a chain reaction and my entire world will come crashing down into absolute ruin.  
Avatar 17251
 
Steam + PSN: PHJF
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
23. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 10, 2011, 15:20 Ratty
 
banddirector wrote on Feb 10, 2011, 13:34:
Our deadbolt is keyed on both sides too, but when we're home we leave a key in the inside lock to avoid any fire issues. If someone breaks in when we're home, we would definitely hear the noise
I got a house last year. When the inspector did his report he made a point to stress that when I get the house rekeyed I should NOT use the two-sided key deadbolts because it's a fire hazard. Screw him. The house is a security nightmare with glass EVERYWHERE. I'm putting in that kind of deadbolt and doing what you do - make sure there are keys in there when I'm home. If I forget and there's a fire I'll just throw myself through the glass.

OK, a year from now when I'm typing a Blues News post with scarred, fleshless burn victim hands you all have my permission to laugh good and hard.

On Edit: I apologize for unintentionally offending anyone who might be actual burn victims or who have friends or family who are.
 
Avatar 22908
 
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
22. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 10, 2011, 14:53 Kxmode
 
Hoop wrote on Feb 10, 2011, 14:50:
Calm your pretty little head fair lady, ..... I shall deduct!

*WACK*


Miss. Oh miss. I am concerned about harmful chemicals. Could you tell me if this rag smells like chloroform?
 
Avatar 18786
 
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
21. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 10, 2011, 14:50 Hoop
 
Calm your pretty little head fair lady, ..... I shall deduce!

*WACK*

This comment was edited on Feb 10, 2011, 17:20.
 
Avatar 34289
 
Um .. Behind you...
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
20. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 10, 2011, 14:46 Sepharo
 
I just assumed that it was a really old door.

Old doors had the need-a-key-on-both-sides feature.
 
Avatar 17249
 
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
19. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 10, 2011, 13:34 banddirector
 

It's probably a New York thing to prevent being able to break a pane of glass in the door and reach in and unlock it

It's the same here - - we have a long strip of glass along side our front door, and although it's a beefy piece of security glass, it's still breakable and would be an easy way to break in. Our deadbolt is keyed on both sides too, but when we're home we leave a key in the inside lock to avoid any fire issues. If someone breaks in when we're home, we would definitely hear the noise ...

BTW, the Encyclopedia Brown reference is *really* dating you!

 
There's no place like 127.0.0.1
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
18. Re: Out of the Blue Feb 10, 2011, 13:08  Blue 
 
nin wrote on Feb 10, 2011, 12:22:
I do find it odd that you have a lock that requires a key to be used from the inside.

It's probably a New York thing to prevent being able to break a pane of glass in the door and reach in and unlock it, though if you are willing to break glass to get in you could always use a window. This certainly seems like overkill for us, as this is not a high crime area at all, and I'm guessing it is also possibly a building code violation as a fire hazard, which is one of the reasons I like to keep my keys in the lock (which completely eliminates the crime prevention aspect too). If I ever change that lock again I'll probably get one with a knob on the inside.
 
Avatar 2
 
Stephen "Blue" Heaslip
Blue's News Publisher, Editor-in-Chief, El Presidente for Life
Reply Quote Edit Delete Report
 
37 Replies. 2 pages. Viewing page 1.
< Newer [ 1 2 ] Older >


footer

Blue's News logo