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User information for Lazarus Long

Real Name Lazarus Long   
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Nickname Burrito of Peace
Email Concealed by request - Send Mail
ICQ None given.
Homepage http://
Signed On Jul 8, 2004, 17:03
Total Comments 1878 (Pro)
User ID 21247
User comment history
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News Comments > Steamships Ahoy - Deadly 30
4. Re: Steamships Ahoy - Deadly 30 Jan 9, 2014, 22:49 Burrito of Peace
jacobvandy wrote on Jan 9, 2014, 21:53:
A lot of people are drawing those kinds of conclusions and getting upset that they'd have to pay money for what they used to play for free.

I don't see people getting upset, but I do see people saying "Meh, played the core mechanics...the rest is paid for window dressing" and I think that's valid.

I played Trials, for example, a long time ago when it was a Flash game on the Finnish site, DNA Internet. I have not bought any of the Trials games that have come out as PC or console titles because I have played the core game in its fullest, that being getting a dirtbike and rider with dodgy physics over objects and ridiculously contrived obstacles. Having played two of the titles at a friend's house, I can see that the core game is essentially unchanged from my Flash game playing days.

Now that I've had that experience for free, why would I want to go back and pay for the same core experience all over again?

I don't and apparently a lot of other people don't want to either, hence the comments.
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News Comments > Clint Hocking Leaves Valve
21. Re: Clint Hocking Leaves Valve Jan 6, 2014, 19:12 Burrito of Peace
All the dick waving aside, why do we care about this person?

A guy who hasn't produced anything publicly visible in six years is leaving to...go do more of nothing that we can see?

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News Comments > Morning Tech Bits
6. Re: Morning Tech Bits Dec 30, 2013, 16:24 Burrito of Peace
The first computer I remember us having was actually a mainframe. A Microdata M1600 with 4K of memory. Dad had installed either Wyse or Wang terminals (I can't remember which) in my room, his office, my parents bedroom and the garage and we all real-time shared the capabilities of the machine. We had this massive line printer that sounded like a German Flak-88 going off every time you printed something.

My very first "personal" computer was an Atari 800XL with 64 whole KB of RAM! That was a really big deal in 1983. I had all the accessories for it, double sided 5.25" disk drive, joystick, voice synthesizer, color monitor and printer. I followed that up with an Atari ST 512 and then a 1024 which kicked the ass of any 8088 or 8086 computer of the day.

Man, I miss when machines were designed to be awesome instead of just cheap.
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News Comments > Hello Games Flood Follow-up
26. Re: Hello Games Flood Follow-up Dec 29, 2013, 20:44 Burrito of Peace
I'm sorry you're devoid of the understanding of sarcasm.  
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News Comments > Hello Games Flood Follow-up
24. Re: Hello Games Flood Follow-up Dec 29, 2013, 20:05 Burrito of Peace
nin wrote on Dec 29, 2013, 18:47:
I'm sorry it hurts your feelings when you're an asshat and get called on it. Maybe next time you'll think things through before making a post like that.

It doesn't. I think it's just a sad commentary about you that you can't discuss things without resorting to ad hominem attacks.
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News Comments > Hello Games Flood Follow-up
22. Re: Hello Games Flood Follow-up Dec 29, 2013, 18:42 Burrito of Peace
Yet you keep throwing around the word "asshat" when no one has personally insulted you. So, yes, chill out.

They are very much an unknown, random company. Doing a mobile game that you port to a couple of platforms, while rehashing it at least twice, does not make you in any way someone that news outlets need to report on frequently. There are literally thousands of "developers" who do this on the Android and iOS platform every day. Are they, too, worthy of near daily updates?
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News Comments > Hello Games Flood Follow-up
19. Re: Hello Games Flood Follow-up Dec 29, 2013, 18:28 Burrito of Peace
nin wrote on Dec 29, 2013, 17:59:
But by all means, keep being an asshat...

Chill out, nin.

I know what they're making, and until they release NMS and it becomes an absolute hit, they're nothing more than a random, unknown company that showed off a promising video. Like the hundreds, if not thousands, of burned out husks of game companies that came before them.

Regardless of their as yet unreleased, unreviewed, pie in the sky product, the near daily updates that are the HTML version of retweets is, in my opinion, creepy and excessive.
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News Comments > Hello Games Flood Follow-up
16. Re: Hello Games Flood Follow-up Dec 29, 2013, 17:36 Burrito of Peace
I can't wait for the next riveting update on these people. Boy howdy, I don't know how I went about my day before without knowing what some random, hitherto unknown company was doing after a flood. Why, we should just have every single fucking tweet they put out up on the front page, right up on top, above every other news story. Clearly they're so incredibly fucking fascinating that we should all follow their every utterance. Maybe we can find out who goes to take a shit and when.  
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News Comments > Homeworld HD/CE Survey
31. Re: Homeworld HD/CE Survey Dec 28, 2013, 10:09 Burrito of Peace
Sugarman wrote on Dec 28, 2013, 05:24:
I was never all that thrilled by Homeworld, definitely had it's good points but seemed lacking at times. That was a while ago so I may think differently if I tried it again. Nexus the Jupiter Incident was always one of my favorites, if one were to draw similarities. Not to pee in anyone's cheerios, just my opinion. I am a sucker for space/sci-fi games so I'm still hoping they do a good job with it.

NTJI was great. It's a shame the sequel never took off on Kickstarter, though the lack of advertisement of the same really hurt it.
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News Comments > Homeworld HD/CE Survey
18. Re: Homeworld HD/CE Survey Dec 27, 2013, 18:28 Burrito of Peace
I said I'd pay 20 for an HD reissue.

For a CE with physical ship model, art book, map of the universe and something else (but not retarded in-game rewards), I said I'd spring for $50.

I don't buy CEs of anything, ever, but I would for Homeworld as it is my favorite IP without exception. I still play it today. Homeworld 1, for example, is gorgeous in OpenGL in Wine instead of playing it on Windows under really old Direct3D. Homeworld 2 is still a gorgeous game and I will even play Cataclysm from time to time under Wine. In my opinion, only Bioshock 1 and 3 have ever given me the same kind of gaming experience that I received from the Homeworld series.
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News Comments > Saturday Metaverse
8. Re: Saturday Metaverse Dec 22, 2013, 08:55 Burrito of Peace
I swapped over to Audacious, which supports reskinning with Winamp skins if you like, and it also supports a whole truckload of formats, FLAC and Ogg Vorbis included.

Tabbed playlists are a pretty neat idea, too. It's available for Linux, Windows and that other OS by the fruit company.
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News Comments > Morning Tech Bits
25. Re: Morning Tech Bits Dec 20, 2013, 22:03 Burrito of Peace
I can't see what the Mac Pro does on a technical level that makes it superior to the computing performance of, say, a Dell Precision or HP Z820 when used as an actual professional workstation that would necessitate the use of a multicore Xeon.

It just seems like a vastly overpriced object d'art for the tasteless to circle jerk over.
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News Comments > Sniper Elite 3 Trailer
2. Re: Sniper Elite 3 Trailer Dec 20, 2013, 15:36 Burrito of Peace
Task wrote on Dec 20, 2013, 10:50:
...the North African Theater was a helluva lot different than they depict in one-sided story WW2 games.

That's because the US, and its culture, has been "USA #1! FREEDOM! RAH RAH USA IS THE BEST EVER IN EVERYTHING!" for the last 70 years and the games reflect that. It's myopic and disingenuous in the extreme but doing otherwise requires the participants to critically view the history propoganda they've been forcefed their whole lives.
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News Comments > J.U.L.I.A.: Enhanced Edition Evolves into J.U.L.I.A.: Among the Stars
5. Re: J.U.L.I.A.: Enhanced Edition Evolves into J.U.L.I.A.: Among the Stars Dec 19, 2013, 08:55 Burrito of Peace
That looks really interesting. I'll definitely add it to my watchlist.  
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News Comments > Total War: Rome II Campaign & Patch
8. Re: Total War: Rome II Campaign & Patch Dec 18, 2013, 07:51 Burrito of Peace
Also, I noticed late last night that, after the patch, my Roman Heavy Onagers no longer have the ability to hurl flaming projectiles. Just poison rounds and regular stones. My entire research tree on all six tiers is fully researched.

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News Comments > Evening Consolidation
7. Top 5 Bad Game Movie-Clips. Dec 17, 2013, 08:11 Burrito of Peace
Is this guy supposed to be funny or just an annoying ass clown?  
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News Comments > On Sale
28. Re: On Sale Dec 15, 2013, 22:52 Burrito of Peace
Jerykk, I have to ask:

Are you genuinely reading what I am saying or are you just knee jerk reacting to people who criticize any 2D game, of which there are several genres, because you're a 2D platformer fanboy who has to white knight that particular genre?

Also, stop changing your tune. You specifically pointed out there were AAA titles available leading up to Christmas releases, which I countered with your own list. Then you backpedal really hard and say "Well, publishers have learned to spread release dates." Honestly, no they haven't. Publishers don't give a fuck about the spread if there's more money to be made in one quarter rather than three others. They'd sell their own mothers in to slavery if it meant catching another $10 dollars in DLC sales. I know, I've worked for two of them. The only reason this Christmas is particularly bleak is because we have a platform generation shift, which I also brought up and you completely and absolutely ignored. You also ignored the fact that it is that dearth of titles that is leading Steam to currently plaster shitty, cheaply done "indie" games wall to wall as their only way to generate new revenue, outside of deeply discounting 2+ year old games or games that were very badly received.

"Are there any 2D platformers you actually enjoy? Please list a few if that's the case. If not, my assumptions remain quite valid."

Your assumptions are never valid because they are just that, assumptions, not fact. That may be hard for you to swallow but it is nevertheless true. As for 2D games that I enjoy, sure, Legends of Grimrock is a 2D game. Moving sprites to simulate 3D doesn't make it so. Since you seem to have a particular hard-on for platformers, I have enjoyed Gravity Guy and Jetpack Joyride. They were fun to waste time on when in long, boring meetings.

Teslagrad, on the other hand, is regurgitated crap with its "hook" being very shallow attempts at object and world manipulation through simulated physics. How do I know this? I downloaded the demo off of Steam! Guess what? It was just as shitty, bland and unremarkable as all the other shitty, bland, unremarkable platformers that are shoveled on to Steam by the hundreds month after month.

Is there anything else in this, or previous posts, that you'd care to ignore while you go tilting at windmills in your white knighting of 2D platform games?
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News Comments > On Sale
24. Re: On Sale Dec 15, 2013, 18:52 Burrito of Peace
Jerykk wrote on Dec 15, 2013, 17:11:
So what it basically boils down to is "I don't like 2D platformers."

No it doesn't. Try again.

Jerykk wrote on Dec 15, 2013, 17:11:
Also, you're making a whole bunch of assumptions about Teslagrad based solely on the fact that it's a 2D platformer.

No, I'm not. You're assuming I've made assumptions. Once more, try again.

Jerykk wrote on Dec 15, 2013, 17:11:
As for the lack of AAA games leading up to Christmas, that's not really true. We have Assassin's Creed 4, Batman: Arkham Origins, Splinter Cell: Blacklist, Saints Row IV, GTA5, BF4, CoD: Ghosts, NFS: Rivals, Rome 2, XCOM: Enemy Within, The Wolf Among Us, Walking Dead Season 2, X: Rebirth, etc.

It's absolutely true. I guess if you make the qualifications broad enough, you can claim that games released in August are titles leading up to Christmas, even though August is in the middle of the summer. Oh, wait, you DID list games that were released in August! Let's look at your list.

  • Assassin's Creed IV: Black Flag
    Release Date: Oct 29, 2013

    Batman: Arkham Origins
    Release Date: October 25, 2013

    Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell: Blacklist
    Release Date: August 20, 2013

    Saints Row IV
    Release Date: August 20th, 2013

    Grand Theft Auto V
    Release Date: September 17, 2013

    Battlefield 4
    Release Date: Oct 29, 2013

    Call of Duty: Ghosts
    Release Date: November 5, 2013

    Need for Speed: Rivals
    Release Date: Nov 15, 2013

    Total War: Rome II
    Release Date: Sep 3, 2013

    XCOM: Enemy Within
    DISQUALIFIED. Reason: Expansion packs are not AAA games.

    Disqualified episodic titles as they are nowhere near AAA game status:
    The Wolf Among Us
    Walking Dead

    X: Rebirth
    November 15th, 2013

  • Three titles disqualified right off the bat. Seven titles released during months wherein not even stores are yet pimping Christmas shit. That leaves three whole AAA titles released during the Christmas shopping season. One of which has a reputation so bad that even diehard X veterans aren't buying it! Thank you so very much for going out of your way to list titles that support my statement.

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    News Comments > Saturday Tech Bits
    6. Re: Saturday Tech Bits Dec 15, 2013, 18:34 Burrito of Peace
    I'm afraid that SteamOS is too late to really change the course of PC dynamics. While I understand why it didn't happen, this would have been a real game changer a decade ago.  
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    News Comments > On Sale
    21. Re: On Sale Dec 15, 2013, 09:19 Burrito of Peace
    Jerykk wrote on Dec 15, 2013, 06:45:
    Gameplay is not defined by presentation and to automatically dismiss a game because of its camera perspective is woefully shortsighted.

    I disagree. How entertainment presents itself is its first, last and only chance they get to separate you from your money. People who put in a raft of top shelf parts didn't do so because they want to play yet another 2D side scroller with shitty graphics and shitty audio because some cheap jackass "developer" wants to jerk off to the "glory" days of 8 bit hardware. I'm not running Xeons and Titans because I think it's awesome to pretend like I'm playing the same games as I did more than 20 years ago. The oft used refrain of "Well, it's about the story" is often bullshit as well. Most of the indie games are shit when it comes to quality writing too. They are no better than the same kind of shovelware crap that we saw back in the days of shareware and newsgroups. The only difference now is the Internet has matured, as have content delivery systems, which allows more deluded, talentless hacks to get their shit in front of the eyeballs of more people.

    While I agree that there can be great indie titles, I think they fall under the same statistical breakdown as more expensive AAA titles do. 95% are either derivative or complete crap while the few remaining 5% really stand out because they were a labor of love by some incredibly talented people. Kerbal Space Program, Legend of Grimrock, Lunar Flight and Artemis Space Bridge Simulator (which I grant is a VERY niche title) are all excellent examples of indie games that can and do get it right. However, they all have a very unique hook that grabs their intended audience and drags them in them cheerfully.

    Earlier, Blue reported that Teslagrad had been released. I commented "Yawn. One out of 900 released. Saturated market." 2D side scroller puzzle platformer has, what, a couple of hundred entries now on Steam that all behave exactly the same way? They all do their best to show you just how puzzly and platformy they are but...who cares? What makes your one title standout from the 1066 titles that are currently listed on Steam as indie games? The answer is...NOTHING! Oh, your wacky, off-beat "humor" in your ridiculously generic and samey game is supposed to? Sorry, I saw that in 492 other titles, too.

    Further, Steam lately HAS been making the store awash in indie games but I understand why, not a lot of AAA titles to market when they're all being worked on for the XBox One and PS4. Since those are oft ported to the PC, all Steam has to offer right now is indie games to keep generating income. I haven't seen so few AAA titles for a Christmas release in a long time.

    Finally, I agree with the sentiment of "Enough with the saturation". I don't need to see a news release here or a splash screen on Steam every time a 10 year old farts during a "Let's Make" session with Scratch.
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    1878 Comments. 94 pages. Viewing page 24.
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